Got My TWA Tapered and Love It !

The Process of Getting My Hair Tapered

This past Sunday, I went to a barber shop and got my hair tapered.  The afro was cute, but the tapered look was more me.  When I called the barber shop, I was already armed with some photos.  Luckily the barber also cut/shape-up women's hair on a regular basis just as he does men's hair.  He told me to wash my hair, put no product and blow dry it out.  And do not cover my head so I don't press my hair down. That way, he doesn't have to pull on my hair so much when he combs it out and he can get a more precise cut. 

When I got there, I was not nervous but so eager to sit in that chair.  I kept staring at the photos that I had screenshots of.  10 minutes later, I finally sat in his chair and he hooked me up lovely. 30 minutes later, I was done. He told me when I wash my hair, it will shrink up and I will see the actual look I was going for.  I went home, cowashed and was extremely pleased with the results as it started to get into it's "natural" state. 

I decided that I may keep the sides and back tapered for a while and let the top grow out.  I love it, it is fun and new.  I also can't keep my hands out of my hair either!  I am loving my hair and it is going to be a fun journey although I have to go through this "trial and error" phase with hair products.
 
Thanks so much for reading!

After The Big Chop - Newly Natural

Hi lovelies!  I finally posted my video on my reaction after doing the Big Chop and cutting my transition process short.  Also in the video, I did not style my hair at all so you can see what it looked like after I big chopped.  I did not want to scramble and try to make it look pretty for the video, I want you to see the real deal.  I always want to be realistic with what I present.  At the end of the video, I had a little more hair cut.  Enjoy!


Thank you so much for watching!

Transitioning Hair Journey is Over: The "Big Chop" Happened

Some of you already saw my "New Hair" photo on my Facebook fan page and/or on my Instagram Page.

My Transitioning Hair Journey is over. 

It was going to happen sooner or later that I was going to cut it off. 
No clipping here and there until the relaxed hair was gone.

I big chopped.  It was done.  Full gusto.  No Regrets.

I was annoyed with my hair and felt I couldn't do much with it because of the hassle of handling the new growth and natural hair.  It was time for it to go. 

The photo below was right after the cut. I still have some relaxed ends I need to cut off.  Just patted it down a bit just to take a photo after the initial cut. I wanted something to compare it to in the future .

This is a new journey I wanted to try out, not because I was tired of getting relaxers. I had a successful relaxed hair journey and I don't all-of-a-sudden hate relaxers. And I will still have relaxer advice if you need it . It is always okay to try something different in anything in life...agree? It will grow back, "Ain't stressin' over here." 

 

I have so much to learn about my hair. What it likes, what it doesn't like and styling.  I'm just ready to have fun and enjoy this new journey.

I will have an "After The Big Chop" reaction video posted after the Thanksgiving weekend.  But for now, check out my Big Chop video.  My daughter MadiMel, helped me cut it off and she was elated...LOL.

 

Thanks for watching and watch me grow during my new hair journey!

Relaxed Haired, Weaved & Wig Wearing Mothers: "You Are A Poor Example For Your Daughter"

Do you take care of your daughter(s) as well as you take care of yourself? If yes, then you are an awesome mother!

 

Who is there to judge you?

 

I thought it would be frowned upon if you as a mom were well groomed all the time, but your child looks neglected most of the time. Or if your lifestyle choices were not so healthy for their mental and physical growth...then I can see how the phrase, "bad example" would apply.

Over time and now more recently, I have been getting several to many emails from mothers about this topic.  Many of these mothers are getting bad mouthed or insulted for having relaxed hair, wear a hair weave or wig while their daughter(s) have natural hair.  I do have relaxed hair and my daughter has natural hair.  No big deal. Our hairs are healthy respectively and I don't see a "problem".  Really, I don't.  I honestly did not ever want to post anything about this topic, but felt maybe a person can benefit from it.

 

I too have been called a poor example as a mother, from people I personally know. I have gotten snide comments too. Back handed compliments: "You have pretty hair, but you should cut it all off and go natural for your daughter". And several social media outlets, I was told that I should not be giving hair advice to mothers with natural haired children.  But I still do and my lovely ladies benefit.

 

A while back, someone had questioned me about how I would have handled a situation if my daughter asked to be relaxed.  I went into a whole explanation about how I raise my daughter.  I sounded like I was being defensive to prove how well and how I plan on raising her. Thinking about it now, it was unnecessary to explain myself.  I was the idiot and sounded pathetic for doing that and giving this individual my time.

*Have my daughter asked for her hair to be relaxed?  Not yet and if she asks, I will ask her why.
 

*Has she asked for her hair to be STRAIGHTENED? Her answer to my "why" question: "I just want to see what it looks like straight."

I agree that hair can be an example for a young girl as far as grooming routine or styling choices. I also feel that it is okay for children to be curious with their question, you ask them why and go from there. Many say that when they ask for their hair to be straightened or relaxed, they have self-esteem challenges and it is our fault because of what we portray ourselves as. Huh? That is not the only ONE REASON why a young girl wants to have their hair straightened, weaved or relaxed.  It does not mean that the only reason why she asked is because she has identity challenges and that it is the fault of the mother.

What about outside exposure, influence and being around their peers that can trigger these thoughts and questions?

On another note, mothers who have decided to "transition" or "big chopped" to go natural, do it for different reasons that are relative to themselves.  I have heard reasons from them admiring their own daughter's hair, to them wanting to try something new.

But I do not feel that hair is the ONLY way to be a good example for a child...let us be a good example all around. Give your children the whole package.

 

How about these situations? 

• I received an email from a natural haired mother almost a year ago whose daughter asked to get her hair relaxed because she likes her friend's relaxed hair.
• An email from a mother who has very loose natural curls and her daughter has tightly coiled hair. Her daughter is upset that she doesn't have hair like hers.
• I read about a mother who is suffering from early balding and has to wear a wig, but her 13 year old daughter wants to wear one too.

So to my lovely mothers who have sent and been sending me messages in regards to this issue for over quite some time (although I did answer them)....pick your battles and keep being the awesome mother that you are.  Take care of your children, keep them well rounded and be a good positive role model the best way you know how.  Keep doing you.

And to the lovely mothers who want to give a side eye to a relaxed, weaved up or wig wearing mother, please stop. There is a way to give constructive criticism without cheap shots.  Divert those eyes to your beautiful children and be a positive example for them.
 

And what good example is one being if they are tearing another mother down because of her hair choices?  We have to do better ladies!

Thanks for reading, we'll chat soon!

Blow Drying The Hair Using The Tension Method

How I blow dry my hair, this video was recorded WEEKS & WEEKS ago. I was 8 weeks post at the time. Finally sat down and edited it. I don't like long videos and try to keep them under 6 minutes. This one is under 4 minutes long & straight to the point. Enjoy!

31 Weeks Post Relaxer - Transitioning Hair Regimen

31 Weeks Post Relaxer!  
This is not an easy hair journey at all !!!! 

Especially when you are transitioning to natural, relatively speaking.  Not only do I have to deal with my relaxed hair on my head, but also the several hair types/textures of my new growth.  So I have about 3 different hair textures/types of natural hair....and let us count the straight relaxed hair at the ends!

31 Weeks Post Relaxer

 

My hair journey has been a frustrating one.....from time to time.  I knew it was not going to be simple and easy.  I noticed that I experienced a lot more tangles with the RELAXED hair as my NATURAL hair grows longer. The areas that were the worst were the relaxed hair that was attached to the tighter natural hair strands.  I do have rough times with it.  I am not going to give you a fairy tale story on how perfect it is, because it is not.  But I have been managing so far with so much patience.

I definitely look forward to seeing what is in store for me when I do become fully natural.  I've been there and done that with my relaxed hair journey as I mentioned before and in video.  I am currently and still MBL (mid back length); the longest hair length I have ever been in my life.  The longest prior to that was APL (arm pit length) which was pre hair journey, pre-haircut in 2007.  I was going to try for WL (waist length) as I transition, but right now, I do not feel that there is a point.

As far as my new growth, when I comb through it with conditioner, it is absolutely a joy to deal with.  Goes through so smooth and....wow!!!  But when it comes to the relaxed hair at the ends, it tangles up so quickly.  Combing the new growth which has a spiral pattern to it will twirl as you comb, causing the straight hair attached to it to twirl simultaneously.  As a result, the relaxed hair latches onto the other straight relaxed hair.  Does that make sense? I do hope so...  But that is what I have experienced at times if I do not use enough conditioner to give it that "slip".  And it happens combing from the bottom up because all of the hair is not the same.  But with patience and due diligence, I manage well.

Hair shedding? Normal shedding for me.  I was shedding more about 16 weeks post.  But since, it has subsided a lot. 

Breakage? Some breakage, not much to be concerned with.  I have been keeping up with my protein treatments, deep condition and handled my hair with as much gentle care as possible.

Thinning? My relaxed hair looks thin when it is wet compared to the natural hair.  Looks like I am holding on to "thinning" hair when it is not really thin.

Edges? My edges looks good.  I keep them moisturized and I smooth them down with a scarf and hands as much as I can.  So much less use of a brush.  If I do use one, it is a very soft brush.

Hair Regimen?  I have pretty much kept the same hair care routine/regimen as I have always done when my hair was fully relaxed. 

* I part my hair in 6-8 sections. 
* I detangle with conditioner and oil.
* I wash in sections and in the shower as the hair is still in its' down position.
* I do protein treatments every 6 weeks using the ApHogee Protein treatment.  That is to avoid breakage at the demarcation line (where the relaxed and new growth meets).
* I have been clipping/trimming my ends each month.  A little less than half an inch, to avoid having split ends traveling up the hair shaft.
* I cowash more than I shampoo, same as I did before. 
* I keep my hair styles very basic, loose buns, sock buns, loose French Braids, or a simple ponytail pulled to the side or back. 
* I still moisturize!

With the exception of the hair relaxer being removed from my hair regimen, here are the minor changes.  Keep in mind that as I gain more natural hair, some things will change.  But so far, so good, I have been able to stay consistent with most of my products for now.  I moisturize my new growth and ends a little more than before and that seems to keep my hair feeling and looking healthy.

Some changes:

* I started doing the ACV (Apply Cider Vinegar) Rinse on my hair when I only see build up. The ACV rinse is a good way to clarify to remove product build up.  It is natural too. 

* And I also use Aloe Vera Gel to smooth my edges too.

* I have also been using the S-Curl "No Drip Activator" to spray my new growth.  It works beautifully and helps my natural hair "pop".  For me, it doesn't leave so much build up, which I actually expected at first, but I do not use a lot of it in the first place.

Here is the link to view my current regimen.  So far it has been working for me.
Transitioning Hair Regimen

Thanks so much for reading!

Stretching Hair Without Heat - "Banding Method" Video

Want to be able to manage your child's natural hair? Especially when he/she has so much shrinkage? Here's a video on one of the ways I stretch my daughter's hair without using heat. The "Banding Method."

My daughter has major shrinkage and I think it shrinks about 75% when completely dry in it's natural state.  It is challenging and frustrating to manage at times.  Most of the time, I stretch her hair after washing it to make it more manageable to work with.

There are several was to stretch the natural hair without heat.  I share one of them in this video.  This video was also narrated by my daughter, MadiMel since it is about her hair.  Please support her, she wants to do her own videos with my help!  Hope this video is helpful!

Here are the items we used in the video.  You can get them at a local beauty supply store or Sally's.  There are also online websites to purchase hair accessories.

The hair bands were purchased at a local beauty supply store.  
They look like this: Hair Bands & Shower Comb

Thank you so much and God Bless! We'll chat soon!

I'm Transitioning to Natural!

It has been a very long time since I have posted anything here. Basically I have been tied up with my daughter's online schooling and preparing her for the standardized test. Those were priorities.
Now that it is over, I am back...

I am back with news too...

I am transitioning! Simple as that. Nothing out the ordinary, it is because I just want to try something different.  I have gone back and forth with it for a very long time. Wanted to cut my hair short, etc. But hey, why not do it now. And I have two of my "sisters" doing it too, Traycee of KISS and EbonyCPrincess of Longing4Length. We talked about it and had versatile reasons as to why.  For each of us, our reasons are valid, and to each of us, the other's reasons are valid because we totally understand.

I am transitioning because I want to try something new.  I am in that, "been there, done that" phase of my hair journey with relaxed hair. I am not doing this because it is "the thing" or that my hair is damaged. Natural hair, why not?
I am currently 6 weeks post relaxer, not much to show right now as far as transitioning ideas yet, but they are coming soon. And I will have some pictures of my hair texture from older photos when I did long stretches in my next post/video.
Watch my video below and also check out Traycee's and Ebony's video links listed below.

EbonyCPrincess' Video 

& 

Traycee's Video

 Thank you for your support, follow me, watch me or join the ride! Take care and God bless!